I know the situation in Israel remains critical and I pray that peace and normalization will soon be at hand. And while most rabbis will not allow themselves to entertain a bit of humor at this time – and I admit, I might be wrong in doing so –  I will do so anyway.  If you think it came from Borscht Belt comedians, you’re probably right. That’s because while most of the jokes today aren’t exactly “K” rated, those from yesteryear certainly were…and “K” stood for “korny” as well as “kosher.”

   “Mr. Schleplowitz, when are you going to pay me for that last shipment of silks?”

   “How should I know? What am I, a fortune teller?

   Schleplowitz (the last guy’s brother) was ecstatic, having figured out a way to make millions. He crossed a mink with a gorilla, sure that he would now have a cheaper, longer-lasting fur. But when he saw the results, he plunged into the depths of despair…the pockets were too low and the sleeves too long.

    Joe Schleplowitz (another brother) who never came to worship saw the light, as it were. He came to the rabbi promising to come to services on a regular basis.  The rabbi said, “I’m glad to hear that, but remember – going to synagogue doesn’t make you a good Jew any more than going to a poultry farm makes you a chicken.”

   This person (whose name I will not mention), received a Christmas card from his employer. When he took the card to his friend asking what “Yuletide Greetings” meant, the friend said, “That’s easy. It means, if you’ll lend me a little something until payday, you’ll tide me over!”

   A husband walks into a store looking for a beautiful fountain pen to buy his wife for her birthday. The clerk says, “Oh, a little surprise, eh?”

   The husband replies, “Right, she’s expecting a Lexus.”

   OK, enough for Erev Shabbat. I hope you join us tonight when I speak on the topic, “THOUGHTS ON THE ISRAEL-HAMAS WAR: THE FRONT ABROAD AND THE FRONT AT HOME”

                           S H A B B A T   S H A L O M !